ABOVE ALL

I have been faithful in going to the Sunday morning service lately (if going there twice in a row could be called faithful, that is). Knowing that my weekends in Italy will be (likely) spent travelling outside Perugia, whenever I found myself ‘trapped’ in this city on Sunday, I woke up early, fought against the drowsiness, to walk alone to the church for about 30 minutes, passing through the empty piazza and walking down inside my favorite place Rocca Paolina, where you can find a mixture of antiquity (the ancient city below the ground), and modernity (lots of escalators inside it).

Though I haven’t known anyone (yet) there, I always enjoyed the service (though sometimes, it felt longer than the ones in Indonesia). It is different, yet felt so familiar, thanks to the songs they usually sing. They have a perfect combination of old hymns and contemporary songs, similar to the ones I used to sing in Indonesia. The difference is, of course, here, they are all translated in Italian. And they’re so beautiful in my ears, that every time I came too early, I was busy copying the text into my notebook, or, while we were worshiping, I secretly recorded their voice with my cell phone.

They have a holy sacrament every week, when the congregation eat bread and drink wine from the same cup. And they don’t have a worship leader, only some musicians and singer in front, and the members of congregation, one by one, call out a song that they want us to sing, adding prayers in between. Once, the sermon was conducted in Romanian and translated in Italian, and I had to really concentrate to understand it all.

But when it is delivered in Italian, I usually can follow quite effortlessly, and manage to learn some new terms every week. Last Sunday, the sermon really struck my heart. I’d never thought that listening to a sermon in another language (especially the third language), would be so moving, but it did. The elderly preacher took the first passage of John 5, about the healing at the pool. He reminded us that too often, we acted in the same manner with the people around the paralyzed, who said to Jesus, “Sir, I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.” He said, we might be sitting shoulder to shoulder with someone, without realizing that he/she might feel that she had no one. And that we needed to be more caring to the sufferings of others.

And I could relate both to the paralyzed and the people around him. At times, it also happened to me… the feeling of having nobody, or at least, no one around me, that is available when I could use companionship or encouragement. And I also realized that, being absorbed in my own problems and worries, I often acted indifferently towards others, who might be in need of my companion, assurance, encouragement, or even, merely a smile and ears that listen.

I was having a rough time with two of my few real friends here. I had been upset, angry, sad, and afraid of losing them, thinking that they were also mad at me, for some reasons. And sitting there in the back pew of the church, fighting back my tears, I realized that it was not fair to place myself as the paralyzed and them as the indifferent people around. On the contrary, it could have been me who failed to see and understand their problems, their suffering.

I’m never good at confronting people, at saying sorry, or starting a conversation after a ‘cold’ war. I’d rather let it ‘cool’ naturally. Yet that day I was so compelled to make the first move, and despite a fear to be rejected by them, I felt relieved to find my own heart filled with affection and forgiveness to them, leaving no trace of anger and disappointment that I had felt before.

That same day, two ‘almost broken’ friendships were healed. In fact, strengthened. And forgiveness, I think, is essential in loving others. Below is the Italian version of Lenny leBlanc’s ABOVE ALL, one of my favorite songs, that reminds me of how much I have been forgiven.

SEI DI PIU’

Su ogni potenza, sopra ogni re

Più di ogni cosa creata intorno a me

Su ogni sagezza e vie che l’uomo ha

Tu eri qui già nell’eternità

Sopra ogni regno e autorità

E meraviglie che solo il mondo sa

E piu dell’oro che in terra so che c’è

Nulla può valere più di te

Sei di più

Di tutto quel che ho

Vissuto per morire così solo

Fiore che è gettato via

L’hai scelto tu

Pensando a me

Solo tu